Kadmifbarn is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, humorless hyena.

Kadmifbarn created gold five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kadmifbarn, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kadmifbarn, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Kadmifbarn's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Kadmifbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Kadmifbarn must be the most important thing in your life.

2. You must love Kadmifbarn.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never wear black coats.