Baflatqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, unselfish chicken.

Baflatqueeg created the Milkyway two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Baflatqueeg, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Baflatqueeg, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Baflatqueeg's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Baflatqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not take Baflatqueeg's name in vain.

5. Goats are not to be trusted.