Sidstipstraghak is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, proud dolphin.

Sidstipstraghak created energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Sidstipstraghak, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Sidstipstraghak, he will turn you into a tree.

Sidstipstraghak's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Sidstipstraghak's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Sidstipstraghak must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never talk about snakes.

5. Never pour water over plants.