Gofhamsat is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, passionate meerkat.

Gofhamsat created parasitic wasps seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gofhamsat, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gofhamsat, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Gofhamsat's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Gofhamsat's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Gofhamsat's priests.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

3. Never go into magenta rooms.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never paint your legs mauve.