Farngumhas is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, fast ant.

Farngumhas created a down quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Farngumhas, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Farngumhas, she will ignore you.

Farngumhas' most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Farngumhas' Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of dolphins.

2. Hide if six tapirs approach from the north.

3. Do not wear silver on your body.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not eat lentils.