Gupnurlnurlkap is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, charitable goblin.

Gupnurlnurlkap created the Milkyway six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gupnurlnurlkap, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gupnurlnurlkap, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Gupnurlnurlkap's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Gupnurlnurlkap's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear coats.

2. Do not wear iron on your body.

3. Always obey Gupnurlnurlkap's priests.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Always treat tortoises with great respect.