Dissqueegstrag is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, calm squirrel.

Dissqueegstrag created Europe five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dissqueegstrag, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dissqueegstrag, he will turn you into a mouse.

Dissqueegstrag's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Dissqueegstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.

2. Never laugh in the presence of badgers.

3. Never paint your neck blue.

4. Erect seven silver sculptures of Dissqueegstrag on top of important buildings.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.