Vanvidtar is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, dishonourable snail.

Vanvidtar created water six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vanvidtar, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Vanvidtar, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Vanvidtar's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Vanvidtar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never think about galaxies.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate sharks.

4. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

5. Swans are not to be trusted.