Fittinflap is a god.

She takes the form of a small, omnipotent whale.

Fittinflap created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fittinflap, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Fittinflap, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Fittinflap's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Fittinflap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never feed turnips to capybaras while wearing green shoes.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate frogs.