Dissguphog is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, omnipotent wolf.

Dissguphog created snails four million years ago.

If you believe in Dissguphog, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Dissguphog, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Dissguphog's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Dissguphog's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dissguphog.