Omtyarpwip is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, capable rat.

Omtyarpwip created the Whirlpool Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Omtyarpwip, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Omtyarpwip, it will turn you into a goat.

Omtyarpwip's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Omtyarpwip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill porpoises.

2. Retreat if seven turtles approach from the north.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never wear rings.

5. Do not covet oxen.