Citwadfet is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, almighty pig.

Citwadfet created the universe eight million years ago.

If you believe in Citwadfet, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Citwadfet, she will think nothing of it.

Citwadfet's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Citwadfet's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Citwadfet.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Always make sure there are no ants in a room before entering it.