Cudcunstig is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, irritating squirrel.

Cudcunstig created the Virgo Supercluster four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cudcunstig, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cudcunstig, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Cudcunstig's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Cudcunstig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about frogs.

2. Never wear mauve trousers.

3. Always treat seals with great respect.

4. Never mention gulls.

5. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.