Wighanpombam is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, fussy manatee.

Wighanpombam created a charm quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wighanpombam, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Wighanpombam, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Wighanpombam's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Wighanpombam's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Wighanpombam nine times a day.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never eat melons.

4. Do not speak about tomatoes.

5. Never think about gravity.