Gedvonktar is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, confident deer.

Gedvonktar created the cosmos three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gedvonktar, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gedvonktar, she will turn you into a slug.

Gedvonktar's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Gedvonktar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Gedvonktar.

5. Always wear cyan.