Hatvinwan is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, narcissistic wasp.

Hatvinwan created an electron three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hatvinwan, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Hatvinwan, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Hatvinwan's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Hatvinwan's Holy Commandments

1. Put Hatvinwan first in all things.

2. You must never eat pineapples.

3. You must love Hatvinwan.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never write about planets.