Xemgudfod is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, able cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Xemgudfod created carbon four years ago.

If you believe in Xemgudfod, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Xemgudfod, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Xemgudfod's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Xemgudfod's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms white.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. You must love Xemgudfod.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Fast once a month.