Gudpomyart is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, thoughtless raccoon.

Gudpomyart created the world four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gudpomyart, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Gudpomyart, he will turn you into a worm.

Gudpomyart's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Gudpomyart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Hide from green gulls for they are unholy.

3. You must never eat nuts.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.