Donfenquill is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, deceitful otter.

Donfenquill created the planet Jupiter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Donfenquill, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Donfenquill, it will turn you into a mole.

Donfenquill's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Donfenquill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never mention snakes.

5. Always wear gray.