Fotpadlap is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, grumpy coyote.

Fotpadlap created dark energy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fotpadlap, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fotpadlap, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Fotpadlap's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Fotpadlap's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always wear purple.

3. Retreat if three voles approach from the north.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Never sit near manatees.