Witquagbet is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, witless fox.

Witquagbet created a photon six billion years ago.

If you believe in Witquagbet, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Witquagbet, she will boil you in a big pot.

Witquagbet's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Witquagbet's Holy Commandments

1. Otters are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not cook food in pots.