Cepbumboss is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, ill-tempered meerkat.

Cepbumboss created the planet Mars seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cepbumboss, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cepbumboss, it will be very unhappy.

Cepbumboss' most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Cepbumboss' Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never feed turnips to monkeys while wearing black jumpers.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Worship no other gods but Cepbumboss.