Looptardun is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, awesome rhinoceros.

Looptardun created an up quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Looptardun, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Looptardun, she will strike you with lightening.

Looptardun's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Looptardun's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Looptardun.

2. Cats are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.