Metsignart is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, humane dog.

Metsignart created life two million years ago.

If you believe in Metsignart, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Metsignart, it will turn you into a plant.

Metsignart's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Metsignart's Holy Commandments

1. Nematodes are not to be trusted.

2. Always help doves in need.

3. Run away if three otters approach from the south.

4. Always help goats.

5. Never think ill of sick great tits.