Sadbemkam is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, overgenerous gnu.

Sadbemkam created the Tadpole Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Sadbemkam, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Sadbemkam, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Sadbemkam's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Sadbemkam's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five nematodes approach from the north.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Put Sadbemkam first in all things.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.