Stantiptin is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, stupid chinchilla.

Stantiptin created water eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stantiptin, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Stantiptin, it will turn you into a plant.

Stantiptin's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Stantiptin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never sit in holy places.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Stantiptin.

5. Respect your elders.