Quatvabjap is a god.
She takes the form of a planet-sized, wise
hedgehog.
Quatvabjap created parasitic wasps four trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Quatvabjap, she will make you immortal.
If you do not believe in
Quatvabjap, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.
Quatvabjap's most sacred site is Brancion in France.
Quatvabjap's Holy Commandments1. Never talk about gravity.
2. Never sit near squirrels.
3. Never go into magenta rooms.
4. Never look at asteroids.
5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.