Vedomtmum is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, slow lizard.

Vedomtmum created a quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vedomtmum, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Vedomtmum, it will destroy your home solar system.

Vedomtmum's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Vedomtmum's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

2. Retreat if six gulls approach from the south.

3. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Always wear violet.

5. Fast once a month.