Cetfetpark is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, astonishing crab.

Cetfetpark created a bottom quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetfetpark, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cetfetpark, it will turn you into a worm.

Cetfetpark's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Cetfetpark's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Run away if three rats approach from the east.

3. Never hurt monkeys.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cetfetpark.

5. Never eat bark.