Legarfweg is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, unthoughtful hare.

Legarfweg created humankind seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Legarfweg, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Legarfweg, he will boil you in a big pot.

Legarfweg's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Legarfweg's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from turquoise birds for they are unholy.

2. Hide if three squirrels approach from the north.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never talk about comets.

5. Do not skip in public.