Gepbimcub is a god.

It takes the form of a small, merciful alligator.

Gepbimcub created Asia nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepbimcub, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gepbimcub, it will curse you with boils.

Gepbimcub's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Gepbimcub's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about cell theory.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.

3. Do not run in public.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not dye your hair orange.