Cidladhig is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, amazing gerbil.

Cidladhig created dark energy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cidladhig, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Cidladhig, she will be very sad.

Cidladhig's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Cidladhig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Erect three zinc sculptures of Cidladhig on top of important buildings.

3. Never think about comets.

4. Do not hurt voles.

5. Pray towards the east.