Cetveenrill Tailfarnsanhad is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, smart porpoise.

Cetveenrill Tailfarnsanhad created bats two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetveenrill Tailfarnsanhad, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cetveenrill Tailfarnsanhad, she will try to impress you with trees.

Cetveenrill Tailfarnsanhad's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Cetveenrill Tailfarnsanhad's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cetveenrill Tailfarnsanhad.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not commit murder.