Signarlfaswigtan is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, awe-inspiring pigeon.

Signarlfaswigtan created a photon seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Signarlfaswigtan, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Signarlfaswigtan, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Signarlfaswigtan's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Signarlfaswigtan's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Signarlfaswigtan loves voles, so they must be respected.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Do not dye your hair magenta.