Quarthotmonpagflybamhubdad is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, unthoughtful squid.

Quarthotmonpagflybamhubdad created everything that exists nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quarthotmonpagflybamhubdad, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Quarthotmonpagflybamhubdad, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Quarthotmonpagflybamhubdad's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Quarthotmonpagflybamhubdad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not dye your hair red.