Ponvegtadbossnaklitfut is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, amazing dove.

Ponvegtadbossnaklitfut created the Black Eye Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Ponvegtadbossnaklitfut, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Ponvegtadbossnaklitfut, he will turn you into a rat.

Ponvegtadbossnaklitfut's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Ponvegtadbossnaklitfut's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never think about amino acids.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Tortoises are unholy and should not be approached.