Dubgutfebmum is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, temperamental wombat.

Dubgutfebmum created the cosmos nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dubgutfebmum, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dubgutfebmum, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Dubgutfebmum's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Dubgutfebmum's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never think about amino acids.

3. Do not eat rice.

4. Never feed strawberries to shrews while wearing white trousers.

5. Always help hamsters.