Hakwonfut is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, humane hedgehog.

Hakwonfut created the solar system four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hakwonfut, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Hakwonfut, she will manifest in front of you.

Hakwonfut's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Hakwonfut's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near monkeys.

2. Never talk about amino acids.

3. Do not drink water in red rooms.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never play with disobedient children.