Kinbetban is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, unthinking octopus.

Kinbetban created the Small Magellanic Cloud six billion years ago.

If you believe in Kinbetban, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Kinbetban, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Kinbetban's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Kinbetban's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always wear brown.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never think about stars.