Flannelbinfobdob Wabmutbot Jarncadkopgad is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, vain mole.

Flannelbinfobdob Wabmutbot Jarncadkopgad created the Tadpole Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flannelbinfobdob Wabmutbot Jarncadkopgad, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Flannelbinfobdob Wabmutbot Jarncadkopgad, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Flannelbinfobdob Wabmutbot Jarncadkopgad's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Flannelbinfobdob Wabmutbot Jarncadkopgad's Holy Commandments

1. Shrews are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never jump in the presence of otters.

3. Never wear mauve boots.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Fast once a month.