Dapjantap Wiknanmab is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, selfish clam.

Dapjantap Wiknanmab created the solar system four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapjantap Wiknanmab, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dapjantap Wiknanmab, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Dapjantap Wiknanmab's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Dapjantap Wiknanmab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no geese in a room before entering it.

2. Goats are not to be trusted.

3. Always help ducks in need.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not trade with those who eat wheat.