Jipbotgab is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, stupid toad.

Jipbotgab created humanity three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jipbotgab, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Jipbotgab, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Jipbotgab's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Jipbotgab's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Jipbotgab eight times a day.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate moths.

4. Jipbotgab loves sheep, so they must be respected.

5. Never write about gravity.