Xenbodcanyim Zodsabcin Teenstafren is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, generous gorilla.

Xenbodcanyim Zodsabcin Teenstafren created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xenbodcanyim Zodsabcin Teenstafren, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Xenbodcanyim Zodsabcin Teenstafren, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Xenbodcanyim Zodsabcin Teenstafren's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Xenbodcanyim Zodsabcin Teenstafren's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Run away from cyan voles, for they are unholy.

3. Never think about comets.

4. Do not take Xenbodcanyim Zodsabcin Teenstafren's name in vain.

5. Never wear skirts.