Dangofpog is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, unthoughtful hydra.

Dangofpog created Mount Everest nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dangofpog, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Dangofpog, he will turn you into a mole.

Dangofpog's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Dangofpog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Dangofpog's name in vain.

2. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a room before entering it.

3. You must love Dangofpog.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.