Arfstikhim is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, witless bear.

Arfstikhim created the planet Venus three billion years ago.

If you believe in Arfstikhim, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Arfstikhim, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Arfstikhim's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Arfstikhim's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three sharks approach from the north.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a room before entering it.

5. Do not hurt doves.