Yamfas is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, astonishing chicken.

Yamfas created the Andromeda Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yamfas, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yamfas, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Yamfas' most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Yamfas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt shrews.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Yamfas.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.