Dagwabhudnab is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, duplicitous scorpion.

Dagwabhudnab created the planet Earth two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dagwabhudnab, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Dagwabhudnab, he will throw large rocks at you.

Dagwabhudnab's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Dagwabhudnab's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six iron sculptures of Dagwabhudnab on top of important buildings.

2. Swans are not to be trusted.

3. Never wear shirts.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.