Jabladfag is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, self-confident pigeon.

Jabladfag created silver six million years ago.

If you believe in Jabladfag, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jabladfag, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Jabladfag's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Jabladfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about hamsters.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.