Vonktenmanhig is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, effective centaur.

Vonktenmanhig created vertebrates seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vonktenmanhig, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vonktenmanhig, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Vonktenmanhig's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Vonktenmanhig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Vonktenmanhig on top of all buildings.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Always treat geese with great respect.