Likfudlik Madkippadaf is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, dishonourable pig.

Likfudlik Madkippadaf created Europe three million years ago.

If you believe in Likfudlik Madkippadaf, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Likfudlik Madkippadaf, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Likfudlik Madkippadaf's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Likfudlik Madkippadaf's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never wear shorts.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Erect nine lead sculptures of Likfudlik Madkippadaf on top of important buildings.

5. Never look in ponds.